Last week, during one of the saddest times of my life, I had an amazing mystical experience. Benny, my fourteen-year-old bulldog was dying, and I was heartbroken. But before I explain what happened, I need to give you a very brief overview of my precious Ben’s life so far.
First of all, after a serious illness when he was just four and a half years old, his spleen ruptured and he went completely blind. To make a very long story short,
the vets didn’t think he would survive. However, he proved them all wrong. Not only did he survive, but he thrived for so many years after that! All his vets called him a “miracle dog.”
Then, ten years later, on my birthday this April, Ben came down with pneumonia and was extremely ill. We brought him to the vet, and she said he was the oldest bulldog she had ever seen. Benny stayed at the animal hospital for a few days, but after that time, she said there was nothing she could do for him and recommended that I put him to sleep. Something didn’t sit right with me about that, and since she couldn’t do anything for him, I requested that I bring Benny home with me. She said she didn’t advise this, and even made me sign a waiver saying that I understood that Benny would probably pass within the day. For a few hours after we brought him home, he couldn’t breathe, and at that time, I made the decision to find someone who would be able to come to my house the next morning to put him down so that he wouldn’t suffer.
Then my son, my boyfriend, and I started doing Reiki (energy healing) on him, diffused eucalyptus essential oils for him to breathe easier, and played healing music in the background. As I was crying, I whispered in Ben’s ear, “You have to give me a sign if you want to stay here with us because tomorrow I’m having someone come to the house to help you to leave your body.” Within about a half hour after that request, Benny took a very deep, cleansing breath, and began breathing normally again! He started to eat and walk around again, even going up and down the stairs by himself. My miracle dog pulled through again!
He was doing so well for over six months after that. Then, about two weeks ago, he lost control of his bladder and couldn’t walk any more. I had to put diapers on him and my son also had to carry him outside to “do his business.”
After a few days of this, Benny began sleeping peacefully all day long and only barked when he had to go outside or if he wanted water. However, he was not suffering. Some people pointed out to me that dealing with this must be so “inconvenient,” and others told me that he doesn’t have a quality of life and that I should put him to sleep. To them I said, “I wouldn’t put a child, parent, or grandparent to sleep if they couldn’t walk or if they had to wear diapers.” If at any time, though, I see that he is suffering, of course, I would think differently about putting him to sleep.
Now Ben has stopped eating completely and only drinks water from a bottle. However, he sleeps peacefully all day long. My son, boyfriend, and I continue to do Reiki on him. I stay with him all day (I’ve rescheduled all my booked appointments to be with him) and sleep next to him at night.
Last evening, Ben had a rough few hours, and of course, I wondered if I was doing the right thing about keeping him alive. My son and I did Reiki on him for a long time. He eventually bounced back yet again and proved that he wanted to stay here with us for now.
On a side note, during the last few weeks, I have encountered countless “without a doubt” signs from my angels and deceased loved ones. For example, the other night I asked them if I was making the right decision about keeping Ben here until he was ready to go by himself. The very next day, as I was driving with my boyfriend though town, a beautiful monarch butterfly swooped down over the car as I stopped at a red light. A few miles down the road, another monarch butterfly did the same thing, and then another one a short distance away! As I parked to go to the pet store, yet another monarch swooped down and circled my car. After this, I went out to eat, and still another monarch appeared and flew around my car! There were five monarchs within one hour that appeared to me! When I arrived home to tell my son about it all, he announced that he saw a monarch circling the house as well!
Also, my deceased mom is continually pocket dialing my sister Nora from my phone because I know she wants my sister and I to connect during this trying time. It’s so comforting to know my mom is also aware of what is going on with Benny.
Okay, so now that you know the background about Ben, let me tell you about that mystical experience I was speaking about earlier! As I was lying down next to him doing Reiki on him the other day. I asked Ben how he was doing, and if I was making the right decision about allowing him to pass away naturally. I clearly heard him relay the following message to me in my thoughts. He said that even though his eyes cannot see, he is always focused on finding the comfort and love around him. That is why he has been around us for so long. He continues to do this, even now that he is incapacitated. (I know for sure that Benny has always felt the comfort and love throughout his entire life, especially during this difficult time. We are truly there for him and love him so much!)
He told me that I should continue to focus on the comfort and love around me at all times as well. That is what we all should do. It is easier for him because he doesn’t have eyes to see. Instead, he is always able to look within.
I must admit that during the last few weeks I’ve been totally focusing on his imminent passing, and it has been so difficult for me, to say the least. However, now I am consciously focusing on the “now,” loving him, and making him feel comfortable. I can’t begin to tell you how much better it feels!
Finally, I asked Benny about how we’re going to cope after he leaves his physical body. He told me that although we won’t be able to “see” him, we will just need to focus on the love and comfort around us and know that he’ll be there!
And so it is with your deceased loved ones! Always make sure to focus on the comfort and love and know your loved ones truly are around you too - guiding and protecting you. Even though your physical eyes aren’t able to see them, you’ll be able to perceive with your inner vision and know without a doubt that they are still there with you!
Angel blessings to you now and always!
**Benny made his transition a day after I wrote this article. He passed peacefully at home as my son and I were holding him. I am so thankful for the decision we all made. Now I just have to remember to focus on the comfort and love all around me.