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5 Things to Heal After a Dramatic Life Change or Loss

Several traumatic events have been occurring recently, taking a toll on the health and emotional well-being of so many around the world. Here are some important steps you can take to heal after you have suffered any type of shock, suffering, or disturbance in your life.


1 . Monitor your thoughts and focus on what you want to happen, rather than what has happened. In other words, instead of dwelling on the horrible circumstances that are presently occurring, shift your focus to a more positive outcome. Then see what you can do to rebuild or repair what has transpired; this will give you a sense of purpose for your future.

A woman named Regina, who had stage 4 lung cancer, came to see me after her doctors told her to get her affairs in order. I told her to do everything the doctors told her to do, but in addition, she also needed to focus her thoughts and energy on healing, rather than on the illness. In this way, she’d be healing her mind, body, and spirit. The first thing I told her to do was to watch the movie The Secret. I also told her that she had to see herself healed; stay away from negativity; and trust her intuition as to what steps to take next.

About a year and a half later, I received a beautiful email from her saying that she was in remission. It is now about 15 years later, and she is still cancer free.


2. Move the negativity out by practicing different energy techniques. Some of these techniques include the Emotional Freedom Technique (tapping), Ho’oponopono, energy healing, prayer, meditation, and positive thinking. (I talk about each one of these in more detail in my book, Your Life After Their Death: A Medium’s Guide to Healing After a Loss.) Some techniques may resonate with you more than others. So, make sure to practice the ones that you feel most guided to use. A favorite of my clients is a combination of Reiki and “angel therapy,” where I relay messages to them from the angels and their deceased loved ones as I am doing energy healing on them. Messages often reveal how the living loved ones in my office can move on with their lives in a positive way.


3. Do anything that will uplift you. Watch funny videos; surround yourself with sympathetic family members, friends, healers, and others that will enable you to feel safe; hug your pets; listen to uplifting music; take walks in nature; read inspirational books; or do anything else that will boost your mood. Whenever I feel the energy is low in my classes (people are often sad because they’ve lost their loved ones), I tell everyone to stand up. I turn up the volume to funky dance music, and I show them how to clear their chakras to the beat of the music. I did this last weekend when I spoke at the Omega Institute in Rhinebeck at a “Wisdom Beyond the Veil” conference. The mood completely shifted, and those who were previously crying began laughing, dancing, and jumping up and down joyfully. At the end of the weekend, many attendees told me that the dancing was their favorite part of the conference!


4. Direct your attention to your many blessings. Begin to notice and appreciate all the wonderful things that are in your life now. Remember, whatever you focus upon expands, so when you do this, even more incredible things will begin to appear within and around you!

No matter what is going on in your life, there is always something to be thankful for. I teach my clients to spend the first five minutes of their day focusing on all the blessings in their lives.

Many people post things on Facebook, and scroll down to see what uplifts them, and then “like” those posts. I tell my clients to take this concept a step further, and as they drive to work, to focus on all the blessings in their paths, in other words, what they “like” in their travels. It could be a beautiful tree, a cute dog, a baby, a favorite color on something, birds singing, etc.


5. Help others who are going through similar circumstances. This will enable you to shift your focus off of your own circumstances and help you to spread the love that you really are.

One of my clients with a son who died from a drug overdose just wrote a beautiful book for parents who’ve also lost their children. She was able to share what helped heal her grief with others so that they can move on in their lives, too.

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