If you feel that all your attempts to connect with your deceased loved ones have failed, please don’t give up. At this point, you may want to look into going to a reputable medium who will be able to do it for you. Of course, you may also want to go to a medium even if you have been successful in connecting with those beloved souls, for further confirmation that they are
around you and are okay.
Before making an appointment, make sure to ask those who have been to see mediums who they’d recommend. As in any important service, it’s essential to go to someone who does the best job. Unless they’ve just started their practices, the most qualified individuals are
usually pretty solidly booked. If you have to wait awhile to get an appointment with them, this is an excellent sign that that they’re getting real, without-a-doubt messages. (In other words, try not to become impatient and make an appointment with a medium who you can see right away and came to you without a recommendation. The whole point is that you want someone who is really
able to make a connection for you.)
You should also feel comfortable with the medium you choose, and may even want to meet him or her before your scheduled date. In addition, this individual might teach classes or has possibly written books about the afterlife. Look into what the person is all about—check the Internet, Facebook, or anywhere else you can receive reviews or information. Then, after doing your research, trust your inner guidance to see if the medium is right for you. Sometimes one who’s ideal for your friend may not be the perfect match for you.
Also, the fee for the reading should be affordable to you, so make sure to ask exactly what it is beforehand. Sometimes a medium will be willing to work with you based on what you’re able to pay. I personally believe that the appointment should also be a healing experience. Let’s face it, when you’re grieving, you’re not feeling your best. Therefore, it’s crucial that the medium you select is compassionate and genuinely concerned for your well-being. He or she
may even incorporate certain alternative healing modalities in the appointment.
Now That You’ve Found the One . . . What to Expect
After you’ve found the perfect medium and made your appointment, all you need to do is be patient and wait. (My clients often say that the period of time that they had to wait to get in to see me passed by so much more quickly than they had originally anticipated). During the lapse of time before the appointment, make sure to continue seeking communication from your
loved ones via signs and dreams.
Regarding your expectations for the session, the first thing to understand is that not all psychics are mediums, but all mediums are psychic. However, the main purpose for going to a psychic medium is to connect with those who are in the spirit world. Once in a while a medium will foresee the birth of a child, a marriage, or something else, but the majority of the appointment should be focused on receiving messages from those who have made their transition.
Sometimes mediums are able to do phone readings, although I rarely do these because I incorporate healing in my sessions. This is why the vast majority of my appointments are in person. (Sometimes, though, if someone lives in another country or can’t come to my office because of a health issue, I’ll do the reading over the phone.) This doesn’t mean that other mediums cannot do distant readings; some can, and they’re able to do it well. Just make sure, again, to ask for a recommendation from someone who has had a positive phone reading with that particular person.
Before going to your scheduled time with a medium, the most important thing you want to do is set the intention of connecting with your loved one. You could do so by telling this soul beforehand to come to the reading and make him- or herself loud and clear.
Another good idea is to bring to the meeting your loved one’s picture or favorite object. This isn’t necessary, but it may be helpful in certain situations. You won’t want to give away any information or distract from the reading, so leave these items hidden in your purse, pocket, or bag until the medium asks to see them.
The messages that are coming through should be very specific, including names, initials, important dates, favorite quotes, or other details that only you and your loved ones know. The information should not simply be, for example, “Your grandfather is here, and he says he loves you.” The point I’m making is that you should receive evidence that these souls are really there.
Also, the personality that your loved ones had when they were here on Earth remains the same, even though they are now in the spirit world. If your grandmother was funny, for instance, the message she conveys will probably make you laugh. If she was loud when she was alive, she’ll still be boisterous where she is now. If she was quiet, on the other hand, she’ll still be soft-spoken, and it may even be difficult for the medium to pick up on what she’s saying.
Be open to receiving whatever is coming through. You might want to hear from one person, but another may come through instead. The medium could be receiving information about one topic, but you may want to hear about something else. If you can, just try to sit
back and trust everything as it unfolds. This doesn’t mean to listen to things that don’t resonate with you. If the messages don’t seem right to you, don’t accept them. Always trust your inner guidance as to whether or not what’s coming through is real.
Sometimes the communication comes through as symbols, so if the messages don’t mean anything to you right away, try to figure out what they represent. For example, if the medium mentions a rose, it can mean that the person’s name is Rose, that a rose is very significant
to you or your loved one, or that he or she is sending you love.
If No One Comes Through
If, by chance, no contact is made during your appointment, don’t despair. There are various reasons for why this could be happening. First of all, mediums cannot make someone from spirit come into the room. If your loved ones aren’t close by, there won’t be any messages
to receive. Also, I’ve found that those who have recently crossed over are more anxious to connect with friends or family members than those who have been gone for a long time. When souls have been gone for a while, they may have acclimated to the other side and are now busy learning or evolving. They also may have moved on to another level, or are already reincarnated.
An additional explanation for someone not coming through is that the living loved one’s energy is very low or that the deceased is very quiet. Remember, the medium is reading energy, and it is more difficult to pick up that which is low. This doesn’t mean it can’t be done; it’s just more difficult to do.
Still another reason why someone may not be able to communicate with your loved one is because the person on Earth simply doesn’t want to receive the messages. I’ve had clients come in and say that they didn’t want to hear from certain friends or family members. It’s no
surprise then, if these people don’t come through.
Of course, there still may be other reasons why someone may not be coming through. It could be something as simple as the medium being “off” on that day, trying too hard, or being unable to understand what’s being sent.
After the Connection Has Been Made
After receiving a good reading, you should feel wonderful, knowing your deceased loved ones really are okay and are aware of what’s going on in your world. The whole process is a healing experience for everyone involved. Make sure to tell your friends and family members the result of your communication so that they, too, will know of your loved one’s well-being
and continued existence.
As a medium, I love when I hear how much the readings help my clients, and how they’re forever changed afterward. However, I always make sure to tell those who see me to continue asking for signs, even after our meeting together. After all, the day of the appointment
shouldn’t be the only time that you receive messages. The best kind of connection is when your deceased loved ones come and give information directly to you.
To that end, please note that one reading is generally all that’s needed to connect with your deceased loved one. You may want to see the medium again in the future for additional messages and healing, but that shouldn’t be necessary. Go within, and if you feel like you want to do it again, then absolutely go for it! Just make sure to spread it out so that your appointments aren’t too close together. While there are exceptions to this rule, my recommendation would be to wait at least a year for your next reading.
- from Your Life After Their Death: A Medium’s Guide to Healing After a Loss
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