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Writer's pictureKaren Noé

The 5 Steps to Healing After the Passing of a Loved One

After losing someone you love, you may feel that a part of you has died as well and not even wish to be here on Earth anymore. On the other hand, your deceased loved ones are probably right there by your side, trying to comfort you, whispering a powerful message in your ear:

“Please don’t grieve for me. It is so hard for me to watch you suffer. I’m in such a peaceful and happy place, and I want you to be in the same wonderful energy.

As you now fully understand, life is too short, so make sure to embrace each and every day, and be grateful for all the blessings in your life. Love and appreciate those who are still here with you. Be strong, show compassion to everyone you meet, and make a difference in this world. Please go out and enjoy life again. I love you so much, and I will see you again when you join me, many years from now. But for now, be brave and make me proud of all that you are able to accomplish in this time that we are apart.”

But how can you heal after all that has happened? Here are five steps you can take to help you with your grief.


1. Most of all, it’s important to understand what happens after we die. Even though the body has died, the energy of who we are continues to exist. For those who are scientifically oriented, just remember that energy doesn’t begin or end! I like to use the analogy of water to explain this concept further. If we put a bowl of water in the middle of the room, it will eventually evaporate. The water is no longer limited to the bowl and is now free to go where it wants. It’s the same with us!

When we leave our physical bodies, the energy of who we are continues, but it is finally free of its vessel and is totally unconfined.

You may want to do some research on your own of “near death experiences.” (This is a phenomenon that occurs when people are clinically dead and then return to life.) The International Association for Near-Death Studies at www.iands.org is a wonderful web site that has a lot of information on this.


2. Practice Different Healing Techniques. There are many healing techniques that can help you immensely as you are going through the grieving process, such as the Emotional Freedom Technique, Ho’oponopono, energy healing, prayer, meditation, and positive thinking. I talk about each one of these in more detail in my book, Your Life After Their Death: A Medium’s Guide to Healing After a Loss. Some techniques may resonate with you more than others; so make sure to practice the ones that you feel most guided to use.


3. Maintain Your Connection With Your Loved Ones. Talk to your deceased loved ones; write letters to them; learn how to receive messages from them; go to a reputable medium who can receive messages for you. Your loved ones want to communicate with you as much as you want to communicate with them!


4. Ask for “Without a Doubt Signs” from Them. Then after you ask, just be patient and wait, and you will receive these magnificent signs. Some of these types of signs are:

* They come through as animals. They are able use their energy to go inside of an animal, such as a bird, ladybug, or butterfly, for a brief period of time. The animal will commonly behave in a way that it normally wouldn’t, such as land on you, peck at your window, shriek in an odd way, and so on.

* They place objects, such as coins and feathers, in your path. If you have been finding these types of objects in your path, make sure to keep them and put them in a safe place so you will be able to see how many of these objects your loved one is sending you!

* They love to come through with songs. For example, their favorite songs may come on at the perfect time with the exact words you need to hear. Often the same song is played in many different places.

* They come through in dreams. All you need to do is to ask them to come, and they will. However, you should ask them to wake you up after they come, or else you will not remember the dream. A dream that is a true visitation will be very peaceful and you will know it truly is your loved one. You will remember this type of dream in detail many years later.

* They love to show you numbers that are relevant to you, such as birthdates, anniversaries – or repeating numbers, such as 1111, 2222, 3333, etc. These numbers may appear on clocks, billboards, or any other familiar place.

* When your loved ones are in the room, they usually make you feel so loved and at peace. It usually happens at the most unsuspecting time, so there is no logical explanation for your sudden bliss.

* Because they are in spirit form, your loved ones don’t have an audible voice. Therefore, they give you messages telepathically. You will be able to tell the difference between your thoughts and theirs by back- tracking your thoughts. If you can find the thought that triggered the thought, it is probably your thought. If a thought just pops into your head for no apparent reason, it is probably your deceased loved one speaking directly to you!

* They turn electricity on and off. They like to flicker lights, turn the television and radio on and off, and make appliances beep for no apparent reason.

* Because those in the celestial realm speak to you on a different, higher frequency, you may hear ringing in your ears when they are trying to get your attention. This is a sign telling you to listen to what they are saying.

* They use license plates to let you know they are there. If a car cuts you off, instead of getting angry, check out the license plate. It may be your loved one’s name, birth date, or something else that was significant to him or her.


The list can go on and on, but these are the most common ways they let you know they are around. If you haven’t received any of these signs, simply ask your deceased loved ones to let you know they are there.

The more you are aware of the messages they are giving you, the more they will continue to allow you to know they are present. Be patient and persistent, and I promise that they will give you the signs you have always wanted.


5. Move Forward. Your loved ones want you to move on and be happy again. They would like for you to set new goals for your future and live your life to the fullest! A common message that comes through in my appointments is, “I’m okay. I just want you to be, too!”


Many blessings to you now and always!


-Karen Noé

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